Brown: Incapacity losing the hand of Prudence

Sir Fred Goodwin was a guest of the PM's at Chequers no more than six months before being forced to quit as RBS' boss. Is there any greater demonstration that Gordon Brown did not have a clue what was going on with the banks until they fell around his ears?

The words of William Blake might be relevant here (then again they might not be and I just include them anyway because they're good): "Prudence is a rich, ugly, old maid courted by incapacity."

It seems that Gordon Brown's incapacity lost the courtship.

We have seen Lord Myners carrying the can for allowing Sir Fred to get away with a stupendous leaving package. Is it not clear from the Chequers guest list that Sir Fred's brownie point reservoir, in high places, was well and truly topped up when he needed it? Perhaps a tad more can-carrying should be done by G.Brown Esq.

A whole lot of snipping going on in Ireland

The parallel Universe which is Ireland continues to whirl on. Via 252 RTE Radio 1 I enjoy all those wonderful lilting Irish accents and their wonderful home-spun phrases. Today, the talk of Dublin was the publication ( at last) of the Report by the McCarthy Commission looking into cutting squillions off the government's spending bill. They've certainly come up with a slew of radical recommendations. From the BBC:

The Irish government has published a report recommending 17,300 public service job cuts and a 5% reduction in social welfare payments.
A group chaired by a University College Dublin economist - dubbed An Bord Snip Nua - put forward recommendations aimed at achieving 5.3bn euros in savings.

Quite a "snip" then.

Isn't that....you know.....thingey.....?

I had a funny moment today. I've just had a busy week. On Tuesday I was all over London watching the exciting de-installation and re-installation of a tape library (oh - the stories I could tell!) and for the last two days I've been in Manchester. It sounds a bit cliched but Manchester really is an exceptionally exciting city. Walking through the streets at 1am was quite exhilarating. The architecture is a bit of a muddle but, somehow, it works. There are some wonderfully odd-ball buildings. One looks like a coat hanger.

Anyway - my funny moment. At Knutsford services I was just walking out after a cup of tea and stood in front of me (about four feet away) was a very trendy looking young man with a girl and another young man. They were looking for the toilets. I thought - "blimey, it's Lewis Hamilton". Then I thought "no it isn't. It's Theo Walcott" - then he was gone. (Well, you don't really expect to see a multi-million pound striker on his way to the toilets at Knutsford Services, do you?).

Or maybe it wasn't him? Oh, I am sure it was. Possibly. He has a flat screen TV in every room of his house, you know.

The Night they tried to kidnap the Prime Minister

I tend to groan whenever I alight on Radio Four's Afternoon Play while driving. However, yesterday's was superb. Written by Martin Jameson, it gave a fictionalised account of the (actual) 1964 attempt to kidnap the, then, Prime Minister, Sir Alec Douglas-Home. I thoroughly recommend listening to it on BBC iPlayer here. There's a particularly wonderful performance by Tim McInnerny (Captain/Archdeacon/Duke Darling and Lord Percy from Black Adder).

The playwright engineers a wonderful moment of vulnerability for the Prime Minister as he is menaced by spirited Aberdonian students. In the end, he foils the plot by plying the students with the collected delights of a Fortnum and Mason hamper and some excellent beer.

My favourite line is when Douglas-Home cries out plaintively:

What is the point of being Prime Minister if nobody takes any notice!

Indeed.

Boris: knocking one off on Sunday morning for alleged £250,000 "chicken feed"

Er.....A weekly article for the Telegraph, that is. From the BBC's Hard Talk:

It's chicken feed. I think that frankly there's absolutely no reason at all why I should not knock off an article as a way of relaxation. I write anyway, I happen to write extremely fast. I don't see why on a Sunday morning I shouldn't knock off an article - if someone wants to pay me for that article then that's their lookout and of course I make a substantial donation to charity.

Just while you're trying to stop your head spinning (understanding any outburst from Boris is a bit like having one's head stuck inside a washing machine while it's on fast spin) let me point out that the "chicken feed" he refers to is the alleged £250,000 a year he receives for his Telegraph articles on top of the, presumably "half chicken feed", £140,000 mayoral salary he gets.

I find this all very depressing. It is very tiresome indeed that the Mayor of London reckons that a quarter of a million pounds - more than ten times the UK average salary - is "chicken feed" and is, furthermore, happy to declare that to the public.

It is hard to decide what attitude brings forward such a statement. Is it the "I'm an arrogant toff with loads of dosh but at least I am honest and open about it and people love me don't they? - or at least they love my lovely hair don't they?" attitude?

Or is it the "I really don't know what I am saying: I just open my mouth and all sorts of nonsense falls out. I really couldn't care if anyone objects to it, because we've got the next few elections sewn up anyway" attitude?

Or...are there any other attitudes that could be behind this? I am genuinely anxious to find out.

Could it be the "look, of course it is lots of money, but if I call it 'chicken feed' people earning £20,000 a year won't start thinking I am a pompous arrogant twit because they will believe that it doesn't mean a lot to me and therefore they shouldn't worry about it" attitude? (Sorry that one is rather obscure, but I am hauling a whole variety of foreign objects up the flagpost here so stick with me and let's see if any of them get saluted). That is, the "Keep calm and carry on - nothing to see here attitude but oops it doesn't quite work but who gives a monkeys? - I certainly don't, I am not going to run for a second term and there's a cabinet job with my name on it and I've got the Camster by the short and wotsits" attitude?

I think we should be told. But we may never know.

Tribute to Denise Hendry

I'd like to pay tribute to Denise Hendry and express my great sympathy to her husband and family at this time. The BBC reports:

Denise Hendry, 43, died from a post-operative infection after spending 12 weeks at Salford Royal Hospital.

She contracted the infection following the latest in a series of operations to try to repair damage caused by a botched liposuction procedure in 2002.

Basically Denise Hendry went through hell and high water but kept on fighting:

Mrs Hendry went on to campaign about the dangers of cosmetic surgery, urging people to check their surgeon's credentials before going under the knife.

The danger of under-reaction

Normally, I over-react to something which appals me. That over-reaction lasts about one and a half seconds during which time I issue all sorts of interesting words under my breath and think all sorts of thoughts which, if enacted, would land me with a heavy jail sentence.

Often I am able to recover and perhaps I under-react as a reaction to my over-reaction. (One has to keep civilised after all, apparently).

I think that is what I did last Saturday. I wrote a post very quickly (within about ten minutes in fact) responding to a post from a regular blogger about women voting.

I would like to retract the elements of soft tone in that post.

Now here's what I really think:

I quite accept that such views about women exist in society (thank you, Asquith). If I heard them down the pub I would shrug my shoulders and move away from the speaker.

But the idea that anyone who is a member of the Liberal Democrats and blogs within the LibDem aggregator expresses such bigoted views about women is utterly appalling. Such views are completely in contravention with the whole spirit of the Liberal Democrats and the letter of our preamble to the Constitution.

I just think of some of the women I have admired and do admire in this party. Enid Lakeman. Baroness Nancy Seear. Baronesses Williams, Sharp, Barker etc etc. Then I re-read these words:

Many women don’t have a clue about politics so they need someone to make their decisions for them and for that reason its OK for the man to decide who the women votes or is it? I don’t see anything wrong with a man making the decision in the household to who everyone votes but then that is just me.

I'm sorry, Irfan. You have had enough yellow cards over gays, Israel and, even, incredibly, basic justice. This is a red card now.

The first British black group to have a number one

It's funny how you can think you heard someone saying something which they didn't. I thought I heard Simon Mayo saying on Radio Two' Drivetime that Real Thing's "You to me are everything" was the first UK number one by a black band (in 1976). After rifling through my reference books and finding Emile Ford and the Checkmates, the Tams, the Miracles, the Tymes and the Stylistics (all of whom had number ones before the Real Thing) I re-listened to the show and realised he actually said "first number one single by a black British band".

But it is a great shame that he didn't even mention the Equals (pictured - Number One in 1968 with "Baby Come back") . OK, they had three black members out of a total of five group members. But they were definitely British - three of them studied together at Acland Burghley School, North London and they first started rehearsing on a council estate at Hornsey Rise, North London.

And, let's face it, "Baby come back" was a half decent record and gave Eddy Grant one of his first public outings. "You to me are everything" is best forgotten, in my humble judgment.

Dame Ellen MacArthur and the superstitions of sailors

Aled Jones had a very good interview with Dame Ellen MacArthur on Radio Two's Good Morning Sunday today. She spoke about the work of her Trust in giving sailing experience to children suffering from cancer and leukaemia. She mentioned that she does not regard the sea as dangerous - it is the wind and the weather that is the problem, 'the sea supports you' she said. Quite logical, when you think about it.

But I was particularly interested in what she said about the superstitions of sailors - not starting a voyage on a Friday, for example. I'd heard the one about not having priests on board. But one she mentioned is particularly bizarre. You're not supposed to say the word "rabbit" on board a boat or ship. If you do say it, you have the scratch the mast, apparently.

There's an article here on such superstitions:

To some seamen the loss overboard of a bucket or a mop is an omen of misfortune, to others it is unlucky to repair a flag on a ship's quarterdeck or to hand a flag to a sailor between the rungs of a ladder. Black travelling bags bring misfortune, and to hear bells at sea is a sign of forthcoming death. It is also considered unlucky to wear a sailor's dress of someone who has died at sea while the voyage is in progress; though once it is over no calamity will follow.

...Another, equally well-known, seaman's superstition is that to whistle in a calm will bring a wind, but to whistle on board when the wind is blowing is to bring a gale. Another belief is that a wind can also be brought by throwing the head of an old broom overboard in the direction from which the wind is desired.

Milk

I know I'm slow on the uptake, but I've finally been able to watch the film Milk. A wonderful, inspiring film it is too. Sean Penn is brilliant in it, so brilliant that it is difficult to believe it is actually him. It is also difficult to believe that such an outrageous piece of legislation as Proposition No 6 was a serious proposal just thirty years ago.

Oh dear, Irfan

Bless him:

Many women don’t have a clue about politics so they need someone to make their decisions for them and for that reason its OK for the man to decide who the women votes or is it? I don’t see anything wrong with a man making the decision in the household to who everyone votes but then that is just me.

In fairness, he goes on to say that such an 'edict' may be defied.

But this is just patronising nonsense. OK, if someone says that they will take their lead from someone else, then that is their right. But let's not generalise. We should value everyone's free decision on how to vote and not second guess their credentials or knowledge. For goodness sake, many men don't have a clue about politics. The problem is that they often think they do have a clue.

A few weeks ago, Irfan democratically allowed his readers to decide not to rename his blog "Scrapbook". I would propose that an excellent new name or, at least, strapline for Irfan's blog would be "The grit in the LibDem oyster".

Can Sarah Teather see through the TV into my living room?

On Question Time (42:30 in) last Thursday, Sarah Teather said that "middle class people drinking wine at home are just as likely to poison their livers as young people out drinking at the weekend".

I didn't see this when it was first broadcast because I was slumped asleep in front of the telly having enjoyed a bottle of excellent Lindeman's Shiraz. So I do wonder whether she saw me there and that my comatose figure spurred her into her denunciation of middle class wine drinkers.

It was an excellent Shiraz though and I have taken a couple of days off alcohol since, to recover.

Sarah Palin stands relatively alone amongst quitting first term governors

A poster on Mudflats has looked at all the first term Governors in the USA since 1900 - all 1200 of them. They found that there have been only three who have resigned without being forced to do so:

Jim McGreevy, Eliot Spitzer and Sarah Palin.

Jim McGreevy "coupled the announcement of his decision to resign with a public declaration of his homosexuality and an admission to having had an extramarital affair with the man he had appointed homeland security adviser".

Eliot Spitzer was alleged to have been involved in a prostitution ring.

Sarah Palin resigned because.....um.............er....................ah yes, she didn't want to be a lame duck.

Photos from around Newbury

...Some photos I've snapped recently around Newbury. Click to enlarge. First, here's Newbury's embryonic Cinema at long last starting to look like one (a cinema).

A wonderful Chinese dragon from last Sunday's carnival:
St Mary's church, Shaw in glorious sunshine:

Shaw House:

Queen Victoria and her lions, again in glorious sunshine:

The remarkable......er.....creativity of the insurance advertising industry

I've often wondered about the faces of reaction that met ideas for insurance (it particularly seems to be insurance, for some reason) adverts when first broached at meetings.

Just think...

"Let's have one of those old fashioned phones - not a new one - an old fashioned one, coloured red, with wheels on it, jumping up over a hill towards the camera playing the tune 'Dum de dum, de dum, de dum, de dah' "

or...

"Let's have a Meerkat in a red silk dressing gown pretending to be a web site owner for 'Comparethemeerkat.com' complaining that people keep on coming to his site instead of 'Comparethemarket.com'. We could even set up a real website called 'Comparethemeerkat.com' "

or...

"Everyone is confused about insurance so let's have a website called 'confused.com' "

or...

"I know - let's get one of the most passe´and ugly-as-sin popstars in the history of mankind, who has made a name for himself by being one of the most likely people never to even dream about insurance (let alone take it out), and get him to rant on about insurance while vomit-inducingly stripped to the waist"

Imagine the faces which greeted these ideas at first! Imagine the substances!

Simples. Eeek.

Cameron's brazen hypocrisy

It's good to see David Cameron sweating "relaxed" for a change today. I am utterly amazed that he thinks it's OK to try to deceive the public by saying, very narrowly, that Coulson wasn't in post when Gordon Taylor was paid off. Does Cameron think the public has a collective IQ of 30?
Is Cameron, indeed, saying (bizarrely, in a round about way) that the Editor of the News of the World at the time of the pay-offs should be sacked even though Coulson was in charge when it happened?!

I was very impressed by Chris Huhne's genuine anger shown about this in the Commons today (see him in interview form below).

Great minds think alike - I thought of the comparison of this to the McBride affair. Then I naturally took recourse to the Oracle, Mr Wilcock, and saw that, this morning, he saw the same parallel. A few dodgy emails about a website which never opened were milked to high heaven by David Cameron. Now, the little toe-rag has been revealed as having the most appalling judgment as to who to hire, and thinks he can brazen it out with his posh accent.

As my grandmother used to say: "He's so sharp, one day he'll cut himself".

Norwich North - time to deliver

I hear from sources that the Labour vote in Norwich is proving 75% "soft" and amenable to voting for another party. We just have to persuade them. Please schedule in a trip to Norwich before polling day to help April Pond with some gentle delivery. It's a glorious city. Full details are here.